I know you are asking how the hell can we date during a time like this, but wait, there is always a silver lining, and this maybe a good time to really get to know someone without having to touch them – physically, that is!
If you are single here in Chiang Mai, then more than likely you are already dating via apps, whether it’s Tinder, Grindr, or you have moved into a private chat on messenger or WhatsApp. The silver lining to this crisis is for the many people who find the giant step of taking dating offline and into RL intimidating, is that now is the time you can get away with dating and getting to know each other without the pressure of having to actually meet! There has even been the launching of an online platform which had been in development for some while, but serendipitously released now, which offers up virtual speed dating and an online dating platform, including video-dating and dating experiences all from the comfort of your home.
If you’re still braving the public, however, you may still be out dating, meeting up for a tete a tete at a coffee shop or a bar, hopefully protected head-to-toe like a human condom.
Those who are preparing for the worse of the virus, however, have already come up with novel solutions, one of which is finding a quarantine buddy. Sounds ridiculous, but wouldn’t it be fun to be locked inside with someone that you have access to doing any and everything with. In fact, there are already many posts to be found on travel, expat or nomad forums looking for a quarantine buddy. Two weeks locked up with a hot stranger sounds pretty appealing.
Personally, I think you could find out so much about a person in this state of hazmat.
Hopefully the art of creative conversation can now return. We have plenty of time to chat, share and open ourselves up to someone, all from the safety of your sofa.
Or we could learn how to date ourselves in the midst of all of this. As PornHub (which is currently offering all Italians free membership) advertised, ‘It’s OK, you can touch yourself.”
You know there is this thing call masturbation and it is glorious. And while New Zealanders are reportedly hoarding up on lube and sex toys – unlike the Aussies who have a thing for toilet paper – Thailand deems sex toys illegal, that’s not a problem. Just use your creativity; maybe a condom covered cucumber, carrot, sausage, etc. You get where I’m going with this. Or maybe even a banana, you know for the girls who like a little curve in their life. This could be the time you spend exploring your body and discovering what brings you the most pleasure. You will be so in tune with your body after all this time you will be able to tell the next person you are with exactly what you like in order to achieve that big O. If you do not have sex toys to help you with this you have definitely forgotten that the human touch is always the best touch, your hands. So, turn on some music or porn, pull out some sort of lubrication, and or oils and explore that body of yours. Don’t forget to wash those hands before applying them on the most precious parts of your body.
But if you aren’t enough for you, then here are some tips on dating while we are locked away going crazy with our thoughts.
1. Get creative with your online date by giving them visuals such as sending sexy photos or just sexy parts of the body. Make sure you don’t overshare and stay safe, but have some fun with it!
2. Engage in a raunchy (sex) truth or dare game. You will be surprised what your date is into, you maybe into just that kind of thing as well. This could lead into a very interesting conversation.
3. Watch porn together. For some people it is very uncomfortable watching porn with someone even more so with someone you are interested in. This could add major excitement while learning what it is you’re willing to do or not and which sex position could give you that awesome-ass orgasm.
4. If you do decide to meet up or have that quarantine date set up, why not engage in a little role play. I think this could be a fun way of protecting yourself all the while finding ways to arouse each other. (Please take the necessary precaution so that both of you are safe). I would suggest to have plenty of mouthwash, alcohol, hand sanitiser at the ready and let’s not forget the most important, soap and water.)
5. Masturbate in front of each other. I personally think this is a forgotten aphrodisiac. I would hate to think as adults we are still shy about touching ourselves.
Don’t let this epidemic keep you from enjoying some play time. But most importantly, stay safe!
#sexandrelationshipsvolumeone #nubianspeakin #iammypoetry #dahlin
Nubian Speakin is a poet with many different hats. She is a host, poet, writer, sex and intimacy relationship educator, model, actress, and hairstylist. She was born and raised in Miami, FL relocated to Miramar, FL and is now residing in Chiang Mai, Thailand.
Nubian started as a MC (rapper) in her adolescent and teenage years. She started writing raps when she was 11 years old. Her love for poetry led her to a different form of expression. She started coming out to poetry venues back in 2006 with her raw and intimate poetry where she continues to write and perform deeper, more passionate and sometimes humorous poems.
In 2014 Nubian embarked on an opportunity to start an internet/radio talk show called “Sex and Relationships” through YoPodner.com internet radio. A fun and open talk show that expressed and discussed the most intimate thoughts and teachings of men and women from all over.
She goes on to host several shows and events as well as two open Mic venues based in South Florida. She has traveled all over the USA expressing her openly sex poems and advice to thousands seeking the most intimate answers to sex and relationship questions. She has earned the right to be called South Florida Sexiest poet of all time.
Nubian Speakin (Poet)
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